How to Create Personal Change

Change

We all want to change ourselves and our lives, but change can be very difficult. How can we gain the motivation and drive necessary to sustain lasting change? Based on my readings and experiences, I've put together a set of activities that will drive powerful change in your life. These activities will take you around 90 minutes to complete, and you will be astounded by the empowering long-term benefits of this investment of your time.


Steps for Creating Personal Change
Here are the major steps for creating personal change are. I will explain how to accomplish each of these steps throughout the rest of this blog post.

1. Build clarity and motivation

2. Neutralize Negative Beliefs
3. Envision and Plan for Change
4. Create Change

The Power of Questions
One of the most powerful ways to motivate yourself to a change is to ask yourself empowering questions. The kinds of questions we ask shift our focus in fundamental ways, and the right questions can funnel us toward power and strength. Based on my experience, the activities below can be used to build powerful motivation and drive for change.


Build Clarity and Motivation to Change
On a sheet of paper, write down the following questions. For each question, write at least 15 responses. Make sure you write about the things that are really important to you. Stay focused and maintain a positive mental state as you write your responses. I have found that a clean, quiet room free from distractions allows me the time and space I need to really focus on what I am doing. Here are the questions:

• What important changes do I really want to make in my life? (After listing out the 15 or more responses, carefully select the one that is most important to you at this time). 
• How will I know that I have made the change? 
• If I do not make this change, what will be the negative, unpleasant, or disastrous consequences?
• Why do I really want to make this change? Put another way, what positive, inspiring, good things will happen as a result of me making this change?
• What successes have I had in the past that demonstrate my ability to achieve this success now?

If you take these questions seriously and write at least 15 responses for each question, you will already begin to feel a sense of motivation toward the change you wish to make. You will begin to draw upon the power of your mind and the strength of your past to build an empowered future of positive change. Your next step toward change will be to identify and neutralize the negative beliefs that may have stopped you in the past.

Neutralize Negative Beliefs
What we believe about ourselves has a deep impact on our behavior and habits. Our habits are a direct result of our beliefs about ourselves and the world. On a new sheet of paper, answer the following questions to identify and negate unhealthy, limiting, disempowering beliefs:

• What do I believe about myself that has stopped me from making this change in the past?
• What do others believe or say about me that makes me feel like I cannot make this change?
• How are these beliefs untrue? (For every one of the beliefs identified above, write at least 2-3 reasons why those beliefs are untrue).

If you take these exercises seriously, your sense of empowerment, strength, and positive energy will begin to skyrocket. You will feel a sense of personal power welling up within you. You are then ready to chart your course for making the change. 

Envision and Plan for Change

You are now ready to plan and execute your change. On a new sheet of paper, answer the following question. For this assignment, you must write at least 20 responses to each question. You will find that the last few are very difficult, but they are very often the most useful ideas you come up with.

• What actions should I take to make this change in my life?
• Who could I rely on to help me achieve this goal and make this change?
• What obstacles or pitfalls can I expect to undermine my success? How can I overcome them?
• What steps should I plan to take (a) today, (b), this week, (c) this month, and (d) in the next 3 months to make this change? 

The Importance of Humility

If you were to ask the most people today what characteristics make most successful people succeed, you might hear a description of someone with vision, drive, calculated risk-taking, and a solid work ethic. And while these and other characteristics are important, I believe that there is one characteristic that is often overlooked and undervalued: humility.

What is Humility?
Humility is a fascinating concept, but sometimes it can be interpreted improperly to mean a low view of oneself. However, I prefer to see humility as a realistic view of oneself, one's strengths and weaknesses, and one's potential for success in life. In my experience, this realistic view is in fact extremely empowering. It helps us see how we can maximize our strengths and improve our weaknesses so that we can move forward toward our goals.

Humility and Confidence
But do humble people also have a lack of confidence? Does humility equal weakness? I answer emphatically that you can be both humble and confident at the same time. For example, I have set a goal to run a marathon this summer. However, I humbly recognize that I do not currently have the skills, strength, or endurance to reach that goal. (Remember, humility is a realistic view of oneself, not a low view of oneself). Despite this recognition that I do not currently have everything I need, I am confident that if I am willing to rely on the trainers books and blogs I am reading and humbly comply with the training schedule ahead of me, I will be able to complete the marathon.

So, you can simultaneously have both confidence and humility. In fact, I assert that the habits of humility are actually required for success. These habits, which I describe below, are the means through which success is actually accomplished.

What are the Habits of Humility? 

The most successful people in the world have used the habits of humility to drive them toward success in life.But what are the habits of humility? I will list here what I believe to be these habits:

• Openness and respect - Successful people are aware that there are many views and ways of life, and they are respectful to others' view. 
• Don't get distracted - Successful people are focused on worthwhile goals and have a sense of purpose. But they do not allow petty distractions such as pride or anger to keep them from their goals. They humbly see past those problems to the important goals at hand.
• Gather data for decision-making -  Successful people are willing to admit that they don't have all the answers and that they need to gather knowledge so that they can make good decisions. This requires a sense of humility and willingness to seek more information to make sound decisions.
• Listening to others - Successful people are willing to gather and rely on expertise from their peers and associates. They constantly learn from others so that they can make the best decisions and take the most appropriate actions.
• Continuous learning - Successful people are aware of their own limited knowledge and are always learning and increasing their expertise. They recognize that there is infinite knowledge in the world, and that continuous learning is a habit of success.

Humility in Teaching and Instructional Design
I have found that the best teachers I have worked with in my life have been humble. They were willing to listen to me and my ideas. They listened to the students in the class and responded to their needs. And they were always learning and growing. I believe that the best teachers always adhere tot these habits of humility.

What do You Think?
Well, what do you think? Do you agree that these "habits of humility" are required for success? Are you willing to cultivate and live these habits?

The Power of Habit (a book review with reflections)

I recently finished listening to a book entitled "The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do In Life and In Business," written by Charles Duhigg. This book attempts to link a large number of research studies, practical experiences, and corporate research into a readable summary of how habits are formed and how we can change them.

The book is very readable and uses clear language and powerful examples. Below I will highlight some of the key concepts presented in the book. My intent is to highlight some of the key principles with a focus on knowledge that is useful to people who want to create change in their lives.

The Habit Loop
Duhigg describes what he calls "The Habit Loop." I've adapted his image below. The habit loop is a process that shows how habits take place. Habits are basically a sequence of events that include a few components: Craving, a Cue, a Routine, and a Reward. The loop starts with a cue, which can be seen as some kind of a stimulus that the individual responds to by executing or doing some kind of a routine. The routine usually results in a reward. If this loop happens enough times, then craving occurs and the individual expects the reward based for completing the routine. Without the craving, the habit does not necessarily fully form. But if the loop is reinforced enough, and the craving becomes engrained, it becomes a habit. 

A simple example: whenever I arrive home after a hard day of work, my lovely wife creates a delicious meal for me. I am in the habit of coming home (the cue) having the lovely dinner (routine) and feeling satisfied by the meal and my enjoyable conversation with my family (reward). After doing this hundreds of times, it has really become a habit. Even if I have already eaten dinner, when I come home and park the truck in the garage, I find myself craving something delicious to eat.

One might notice that this is a nice way of rewording the basic principles of behaviorism - stimulus, response, reward. The addition of craving is somewhat new to me, but it is still fits with the assumptions behind behaviorism.

The Keystone Habit
One very powerful concept within the book is what the author calls the Keystone Habit. Duhigg asserts that when an individual can make a change to one key habit, change seems to cascade into many other habits and other areas of life. He shares an example of one woman who decides to eliminate her habit of smoking, and how making that one change also facilitated her own improved weight management, her relationships, her health, and her finances. One outstanding habit can disrupt a pattern of living and have a lasting positive influence on an individual.


My Own Recent Keystone Habit
I recently had an experience in which I adopted one habit that cascaded into change in other areas of my life. For me, the keystone habit was teaching a seminary bible study class for youth in my church at 6:30 in the morning. This new habit invited several changes:

• It encouraged (forced) me to go to bed on time. (I used to stay up ultra-late wasting my time watching TV or surfing the internet).
• This allowed me to sleep enough to be healthy.
• I had more time in the mornnig, so I began to exercise each morning directly after the seminary class. 
• Along with that, I decided to begin watching my caloric consumption and begin to eat healthier foods. 

Since starting to teach seminary in the morning, I have lost 45 pounds and have exercised nearly every day for the last 4 months. Just like the woman who stopped smoking and subsequently changed many other habits, my keystone habit of going to bed early and teaching seminary has provided me with the ability to incorporate many other healthy, empowering habits in my life.

The keystone habit change is what I would call a macro-level change strategy. It is something that alters and disrupts the overall patterns of a person's life so that new patterns can be formed. There are micro-level change strategies described below that can be used to alter specific habits.

Short-circuit the Habit Loop
In addition to incorporating a keystone habit, we can also short-circuit and change our current habits. In describing the habit loop, Duhigg writes that eliminating the cues that stimulate craving and that prompt a routine might not be possible, so we need to figure out how to use these cues in meaningful ways. Undesirable habits can be reformed into desirable habits. He notes that the routine that a person goes through can be changed, as long as some kind of a reward is received. Let's look at some examples.

Example of short-circuiting the habit loop: I have noticed that when I see a delicious piece of food - a lovely cookie, for example - it acts as a cue. This cue prompts my craving for the yummy feeling that comes from eating the cookie, and my mind immediately (and without my permission!) imagines me eating the cookie (the routine) and enjoying the delicious rush of sugar (the reward).

I have found that I have little control over this cue - it is always there. However, I have recently experimented with short-circuiting this habit loop. Whenever I see a tempting cookie or treat, I replace the routine by imagining myself pushing the plate away and then smiling to myself and engendering a sense of pride that I am taking care of my body. I have found over time that the cue becomes weaker and the new routine is becoming stronger.

I must admit that I have not fully replaced the habit, yet. I am still working on revising this habit loop, and I have faltered a few times over the past several months. But I can see that my patterns are slowly and surely changing. I have to constantly apply self-control, but the new habit is slowly emerging.

A few additional notes on habit change:

•  Belief and Habit Change- Research seems to indicate that to have lasting change, you must  believe that you can change your habits. You have to believe in yourself and believe that you have the capacity to accomplish. Duhigg shares the example of Alcoholics Anonymous and shows how this self-belief often stems directly from a belief in a higher power. I have found that a great deal of my own personal power to create positive changes in my life stems directly from my faith in God.
• Willpower and Habit Change - I have found that we can increase our ability (willpower) to overcome the impulses that we have developed in our minds and bodies. An increase in self-mastery and willpower in one area enables an increase in another area.Change does not come without effort, but an understanding of the fundamentals of habit change can help us leverage our natural tendencies so that we can most effectively make change in our lives.
• Social Aspects of Habit Change - The people you spend time with influence the kind of person you become. Religious organizations, classes in school, volunteer organizations, workout partners, mentors, and coaches are all examples of this. I find that surrounding myself people that can help me succeed is one of the most crucial factors for success.

Summary
I would highly recommend Duhigg's "The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do In Life and In Business." It is a clear, well-written guide to understanding habits and provides a good foundational knowledge of the fundamental principles of habit change. I would not necessarily call it a how-to book for changing habits. But it provides knowledge that is meaningful and insightful and provides some powerful examples of change and success that can be built upon. Great work, Duhigg.

My New Areas of Study: Motivation, Habits, and Success

I have been in teaching, training, or designing instruction in various capacities for roughly the past 13 years. For the past 6 years, I have studied in the field of educational technology and instructional design and have earned 2 graduate degrees and published several articles in the field. I have found a home in this field, and it has been a great joy to learn what I have about instructional effectiveness.

The Purpose of Education
At the broadest level, one could state that the purpose of education (and by extension instructional design) is to enable an individual to live a successful, meaningful, contributing life. I believe that I have a basic grasp of how to help students gain knowledge and skills, but I believe I have an opportunity to understand more about how I can positive influence students to adopt outstanding habits, build their motivation, and help them move forward with success in their lives.

A Shift in My Research Interests
I am now beginning to feel a shift in my personal research interests. I have realized that some of the most important aspects of a student's success learning do not occur outside of an individual (e.g. the instruction we present to a learner). In the field of educational technology and instructional design we tend to focus on doing something to students to influence there learning and behavior. I know from research and experience that using effective strategies to provide students with learning experiences is vital to helping a student succeed. However, I also believe that the internal motivation, habits, and characteristics of a student are perhaps even more important than the external strategies we use to help instruct them.

Learning About the Internal
All of my own research has focused on what the instructor or instruction (external to the student) does to engender learning. I have asked fundamental questions about what good instructors do, what strategies more effectively help students learn, and what steps designers can take to create effective instruction. I will never stop seeking the answers to these questions; however, there are other fundamental questions about learning that I plan to start to investigate.

My Emerging Interests
Among other things, here are the general topics that I am interested in learning more about. These are areas that I have some knowledge of, though my knowledge is more peripheral and perhaps biased.


Motivation

• What are the psychological and neurological features of motivation?
• What creates the motivation to act in an individual?
• What strategies can be used used to influence and create motivation in an individual?
• What are the most effective strategies for influencing motivation in an individual?

Habits

• What are the psychological and neurological features of habits?
• How are habits formed?
• How can undesirable habits be eliminated or modified?
• How can positive habits be created and automated in a person's life?
• What strategies can be used to help others eliminate undesirable habits?
• What strategies can be used to engender positive, automated habits in another individual?

Success

• What are the psychological and neurological features of success?
• What makes an individual successful in achieving meaningful, difficult goals?
• What strategies can be used to help an individual be successful in his or her own life?

Book Review - "Instant Influence"

I recently listened to Dr. Michael Pantalon's book Instant Influence. In this book, Pantalon synthesizes research that he and others have done on how to influence others by helping them find motivation to make some kind of change in their life. He presents a series of questions that have proven to create motivation in others and help them create their own motivation to make change in their lives.

According to Pantalon, when you are working to motivate another individual, you must adhere to a few key principles:

• Affirm the individual's free choice, their autonomy to choose their own actions. This affirmation must be sincere.
• Do not tell the individual to change. Do not tell them why or how to change - have him or her generate personal reasons and ways to change.
• Have sincere care for the individual, have a true desire to help the individual move forward.

Pantalon recommends asking the individual 6 Questions, which are designed to help the individual determine their own motivation for doing a specific thing. After identifying a change that you believe the individual should make to improve their life, ask the following questions:

• Why might you change?
• How ready are you to change on a scale of 1 to 10?
• Why didn't you pick a lower number?
• Imagine you have changed. What would the positive outcomes be?
• Why are those outcomes important to you?
• Whats the next step, if any?

The goal of these questions is to help the individual determine his or her own internal motivation for doing the behavior in discussion. I believe that the internal motivation is much more powerful than any outside motivation, and these questions appear to help an individual tap in to that internal motivation.

Pantalon also recommends using these questions to help motivate oneself into some kind of action or change in your own life. I have personally used these strategies on myself since reading the text and find that it truly does provide a surprising sense of internal motivation and excitement about making changes that seem important but that are difficult to start doing.

As a scholar, I prefer books that appear to be based on sound research and experience, and Pantalon references his own research, the research of others, and his experiences using the system he promotes. I found the book easy to follow and found the many examples very helpful in aiding me to understand how the 6 Questions can be applied.

Great, useful work.